My car is a dear, She is a '85 Toyota Celica with well over 350,000 miles on her... But she is a good car, we have been through alot.
For the majority of my driving life I have had to commute a good half hour to work everyday.
There were a few months last year where I lived rather close to work. But even then I would go the "long" way home.
I love driving home late at night. (or early in the morning)
I think my best thoughts in my car, it is the one place I am really able to sort out my very confused and muddled brain. I can be totally honest, completely me.
One of my favorite songs says "You can fall apart if it suits you, turn the radio louder if the music moves you."
That is kind of how I feel in my car. I will admit I fall apart in my car often. Sometimes it is the only place I allow myself to let go. I remember last year after I lost my job, I knew I was about to have to move out of the great house I had just moved into. My car was all I had... It was the one thing I owned. My safe place. I went on alot of drives.
One day it was raining and this guy hit the back of my car. I immediately burst into tears, pulled over and got out of my car to check damages (as did the fellow who hit me) I was a mess.
Bawling my eyes out. He kept trying to tell me that no damage was done. Which was true... The only issue was the hitch on my car was bent up. But let's be honest. I will NEVER be pulling anything with this car. Anyway I am still crying, the guy trying to reassure me that it is ok. I finally in the midst of my tears, looked at him and practically yelled "I need to go home!" and got in my car and left.
It is actually a very funny story now. That poor guy. I don't think I have ever cried that hard.
it was just that my car was all I had left.
I miss all of those moments of quiet. Though I always have music playing, it seems to be the one place that everything else isn't trying to get my attention.
If I were a song writer, I would write some darn good songs on my late night drives.
But instead I cry, I scream, I sing at the top of my lungs, I most certainly talk to myself.
And think brilliant thoughts.
I definitely look forward to the nights I get to drive to and from Greenville and/or Gray Court.
I always come away from those drives with life making some sort of weird sense again.
I understand that. I remember lots of yelling and screaming and crying in the van back in 2006/2007. Even yesterday i had a nice long conversation with Godde about a few things. No radio for me until we figure out that damn code though!
ReplyDeleteI will be happy to oblige you with the long drive home from Gray Court anytime. I missed being here with you last night. But I think I would have burst into tears that Kent didn't win.
I totally get this. Your story about being hit really touched me.
ReplyDeleteI do a lot of praying in my car, and I feel like those are often the most "honest" prayers, the ones where I'm doing a lot of sighing instead of speaking, or I'm crying and shouting instead of remembering to be thankful. Yeah, I totally get this.